Fantasy Buddha

As I perused my Tumblr dashboard earlier tonight, I came across this awesomely 80’s photo via FullMetalStarterJacket.

This pic got me reminiscing about how much I really used to dig watching Dwayne Schintzius play ball back in the day at Florida. Then, as I googled Schintzius, I found out some very saddening news.

Dwayne Schintzius passed away due to respiratory failure stemming from complications brought on by bone marrow cancer back in April earlier this year. He was only 43 years old.

I suppose I can understand how this news slipped through the cracks. Schintzius — despite playing parts of nine seasons in the NBA — was more or less a localized Florida hero. After all, he was born and raised in the Tampa area and went on to become a star center at UF. Schintzius also had one of the greatest mullets — he called it “The Lobster” — in the history of mankind and was so dedicated to his hairstyle that he twice sabotaged his basketball career in honor of the ‘do.

First, he chose to leave the University of Florida for the NBA primarily because he refused to lose “The Lobster” per the orders of interim Gators coach Don DeVoe.

Later, Schintzius actually did trim his mullet at the behest of San Antonio Spurs general manager Bob Bass. However, the disgruntled seven-footer decided to keep the clippings from his haircut and mail them to Bass in an envelope. Not long after that, and certainly not surprisingly, Schintzius was dealt to the Sacramanto Kings for forward Antoine Carr.

So, as thankful as I was to see this photo of Dwayne Schintzius — along with fellow “Florida Skyliners” Dwayne Davis and Livingston Chatman — it has clearly stirred up a bevy of mixed emotions.

In spite of his hubrus and his hairdo, Schintzius was one helluva college basketball player.

At 7’ 2” and 260 pounds, Schintzius was capable of dominating whenever the whim hit him. Unfortunately, his biggest flaw was that he lacked the motivation to capitalize on his abilities game in and game out. Throughout it all, he remains the all-time leader in blocked shots at Florida and — more than twenty years after his collegiate career ended — Dwayne Schintzius is the only player in SEC hoops history to amass more than 1,500 points, 800 rebounds, 250 assists and 250 blocks.

Now — six months after his passing — I say goodbye to a man who was a character off the basketball court and an All-American on it.

Rest in peace, Dwayne Schintzius…to you and “The Lobster.”

This is happening.

(via gotemcoach)

This makes me break out in cold sweats as my jaw clenches out of control.

I wish that I could slip on my original red, black and white Air Jordans, click my heels and make Mike’s entire Wizards fiasco disappear into the ether.

Never. Shoulda. Happened.

Man, I miss my original Air Jordans.

I still vividly remember the day my Mom bought them for me. It was my 15th birthday — so around July 18, 1970 — and the price of I believe $47 back then was unheard of. But, like I said, it was my birthday and my folks hooked me up.

Who knew how much branding and marketing and sneaker culture would change as a direct result of those shoes over the next 27 years?

Most people either overlook or simply don’t remember how revolutionary the Houston Rockets “Twin Towers” of Ralph Sampson and Hakeem Olajuwon were in the mid 80’s.

It wasn’t just their height — Sampson was 7’ 4” while Olajuwon was listed at 7’ 0” — but their individual skill levels. Both men ran the floor like smaller players while dominating defensively and on the glass.

Sampson was, at that time, considered soft for a big man because he enjoyed playing away from the basket. However, this has become a staple — especially for European big men — in the generation since.

Meanwhile, Hakeem “The Dream” used the footwork he learned growing up as a soccer player in Nigeria to become one of the NBA’s most dynamic low-post players. Modern big men beg for the opportunity to work with Olajuwon — pioneer of the “Dream Shake” move — in hopes of elevating their respective post repertoires.

The “Twin Towers” never won an NBA title together — they lost in 1986 to the Boston Celtics in six games — but they each contributed to changing the game and could have gone down as the greatest 1-2 punch in the history of big men had Sampson been able to avoid the chronic knee injuries which curtailed his greatness.

Just in case there was any question where I stand in the year’s NBA Finals, I present to you lifelong Washington Redskins fan Kevin Durant.

It appears that he is just as excited about RG3 as the rest of us Skins fans.